Lawn Care Chapter 2, A.K.A. Sunburns & Soreness

Now that we have covered the installation and watering of the lawn. Also now that it is quite clear that purchasing a puppy instead of a lawnmower does nothing to trim the grass; we will proceed to the propper way to cut the grass. First, you must go and actually purchase a lawnmower. A rotatry blade manual push mower works well. So purchase one of those and save the hassle of repairs & purchasing gas for it. Attention: Using a manual mower is not easy when you haven't mowed the lawn in three weeks and the grass is 4" tall. Then it is just darned hard to push and will take you 4 hours to mow your lawn. Now that a mower has been purchased and assembeled, you need to mow the lawn. See advisory above about difficulties attributed to procrastination of step one. Another thing to pay attention to is while you are mowing the lawn for 4 hours, be sure to wear sunblock! Forgetting this improtant step will lead to painful burns on legs that haven't seen the sun in what seems like years. Also the leg burns will be aggrivated by jumping, clawing puppies, and a toddler that graps your legs constantly. Also, be prepared not to sleep the following night due to legs that ache from pushing the mower through dense jungle like grass that should have been mowed 2 weeks prior. Now that your lawn is a lovely 1.25" high, you will notice that it is easier to spot the dog poop.(until you get him to go in the right place and you no longer have to watch your step). And you now do not have to worry about your toddler getting lost in the jungle of fronds and sprouting grass that almost tickled her chin when crawling. Chapter Summary: Mow lawn frequently with lawn mower (don't leave it to rampaging puppy to chew that to bits too). Wear Sunblock (anyone remember that talking song that came out around '99? "trust me on the sunblock") If you fail to heed the wearnings, be prepared to be stiff & sore for a few days. Chapter Questions: 1. What should you buy instead of a puppy to mow the lawn? 2. Who grabs at your legs when they are bright red with a sunburn? 3. Do you really need to mow the lawn every week, or what are the consequences if you wait?